So today I just thought I would write a little about things that are working well for baby and me and things we could use some suggestions for. I'm a study-it-out kind of gal. I like books. So I've been doing a lot of reading. Mostly I've been using these resources:
The Baby Book (Sears): This is a humongous book that has a lot of great information. Dr. Sears also endorses attachment-parenting (things like demand-feeding, baby carrying, co-sleeping, and anything else that helps mimic the baby's time in the womb). There are some things that I like, but some of it feels a little too 'new age' for me. I do like to put the baby in his little backpack and carry him around with me for a little bit while I do basic housework (vacuuming, wiping counters, etc.), especially now that he is more curious about the world around him. The backpack is also awesome for grocery shopping because I have room in the cart for groceries and my arms are free. I was thinking about getting a baby sling initially, but just last night I saw on the news that they have issued a warning about slings and babies suffocating. I think I'll just stick to my backpack. I used to co-sleep with baby a little as far as, I would take him out of his cradle which was next to my bed in order to nurse in the middle of the night and usually I would fall asleep while he was nursing. I tried to sit up more to stay awake but it never worked. I would wake up an hour later and baby would be snoring away. Now that we've moved baby into his crib in the nursery at night (which, by the way, was very traumatic for me but not so much for the baby! I cried and cried the first night that he wasn't right there in the cradle. And maybe, I'll admit it, I went and slept on the nursery floor for a couple of nights...), I will often bring him to bed with me when he wakes up to eat around 5:00 a.m. Hubs has been leaving some subtle hints that he doesn't like the baby in bed with us in the morning. He was the one really pushing that baby be moved out of the room to his crib from almost the first month. I think he's jealous, but most of the time, he's out of bed by then and off to work anyway. But in an attempt to show Hubs that I love him, I've tried to put baby back in his crib on weekends or when Hubs is going to be in bed later. My general rule is: once Hubs leaves his spot, it's all baby's.
Babywise (Ezzo):This book is very controversial. Either people love it or hate it. Its big push is routine and training your baby into a schedule instead of going by the baby's schedule. However, I don't think it is as rigid as some people think or maybe because I'm not a rigid person, I didn't take it that way. I didn't like that the author would really put down other parenting methods in order to make his method the 'best' one. Most of the other books I've been reading just say to take their suggestions and do what works best for me as an individual. I was not able to stick to the routines as suggested, but what I did take from this book that has really worked out well for us is the pattern of eating-wake time-sleep. It was opposite of what I was doing before (eating-sleeping-wake time), but has really made a difference in how well Baby sleeps and he seems more alert during wake time. We do have a pretty good routine going during the day (I think). We mostly work on a 3-hour schedule.
5:00 a.m. First feeding of the morning then sleep
8:00 a.m. Feeding, bath for baby, I either try to do scripture study or work out, then I take a shower.
Between 9:30 and 1o:00-Put baby down for his morning nap.
11:00-Feeding, baby play time, mommy computer time
Between 12:30 and 1:00-Nap time, I try to get some cleaning done.
We pretty much try to keep this 3-hour pattern going through out the day. I've been trying to set up a bed-time routine where starting at 7:30 I feed baby, change him, put on his jammies and give him a little baby massage, read a story, and put him to bed by 8:00. Then I think I need to wake him up around 11:00 or 11:30 for a late-night feeding. I think if I decide the time of the late night feeding then he won't choose random times in the middle of the night. Right now he really only wakes up onces in the middle of the night to eat. Sometimes he does sleep through the night, but more often then not, he'll wake up some time between 1:00 a.m. and 3:00 a.m. I really need to get more consistent with my bedtime pattern. I would love any suggestions that ya'll have on how to get him to sleep all the way through the night. I know that he is only four months old, but I feel like we're so close to achieving all-night sleeping, that I'm just missing some step or something. I've had a really hard time with the let-the-baby-cry-it-out concept. I've tried letting Baby cry and 'self-soothe' and even after 30 minutes of screaming, he's still escalating and not coming anywhere near calming down. I don't like it. I have found, however, that if he is really cranky and fussy, if I let him cry for about five minutes and then go in and comfort him (rock him, hold him), usually I can do this for five minutes and then put him down in his crib, and he will go right to sleep. I've also found that he likes something over his eyes to go to sleep, so I've been experimenting with different ways to make a bed-teepee. I get nervous because sometimes he likes to pull blankets over his head and I worry that he's going to smother himself. Maybe I need to invest in a little baby sleep mask--I bet I could figure out how to make a safe one...or maybe I should try putting a blindfold on him...or maybe I'll just stick to the bed-teepee.
What To Expect the First Year and whattoexpect.com (Murkoff):I love the information from the book and the website. I think that these have been the most useful to me. Everyday I get an email with information. What to Expect When You're Expecting was my pregnancy bible! I've put a few links on my blog from the website. I like that the information is very straightforward and doesn't necessarily endorse just one method. Everything from health issues to daily care to playtime to helping include Hubs in things, the information is great! Usually when I have a question, this is where I turn.
Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child (Weissbluth): This is what I'm currently reading. I like a lot of the stuff in this about the importance of healthy sleep, but the book also makes me feel a little nervous some times that if I don't ensure that my baby gets enough sleep, he's going to end up a socio-path! I totally agree that babies need to get plenty of sleep for their physical, emotional, and cognitive development though. I like the idea of having a sleep routine and teaching babies how to sleep well and develop healthy sleep habits. Sometimes, the books suggestions are a little too extreme for me though. Like the idea of completely establishing your family's schedule around the baby's sleep schedule so that the baby is sleeping in his crib at the right time for the right amount of time every day. So far, it has worked out pretty well to arrange that if I need to run some errands to do it while the baby is sleeping in his car seat. Maybe as he gets older this won't work as well, I don't know. But I do think there has to be a little give or take. I think it does take a lot of scheduling and figuring out things to make the schedule work best for the baby, but I also don't think you should have to totally push pause on your family's life to do what is best for the baby. For example, the book recommends a really early bedtime (sometimes as early as 5:30 p.m.) If this doesn't work with your schedule, too bad. The book suggests letting family and friends know that you just can't go out after bedtime until the baby is much older. If this were the case at our house, Hubs would never get to interact with the baby during the week day. How sad! I started a earlier bed time of 8:00 p.m and would like to move it earlier to 7:30 or 7:00, but haven't got there yet. The big points that I do like so far are the importance of naps in getting baby to sleep better at night, the need for around 12-15 hours of sleep each day (naps and night time), soothing methods to prepare baby for sleep, and the idea of developing good sleep habits from the beginning.
Sorry this post is sounding like a report for a school. I'm a mommy nerd, I admit it. In addition to reading lots of books, I also take any advice I can get (hint, hint)! To end this post, I'll list the top seven things that really worked for me, and I'll include some pictures of my super-cute baby!
My Favorite Things or Things that have WORKED:
1. My Boppy Pillow: great for nursing, feeding with a bottle, playing on the floor...I love it!
2. For getting rid of cradle cap, I read on another blog to use baby oil and Dove liquid soap. For a few days, I put baby oil gel on baby's head, let it soak in, and then washed his hair with Dove extra-moisturizing body soap and a toothbrush. It worked perfectly! The yellow, flaky skin was gone after about 3 times of doing this, and I really like the smell of Dove soap.
3. and 4. We've recently discovered the joy of the playpen. Baby loves to lie in his playpen and swing at toys. Thanks to my cousin and his awesome wife for the playpen, baby can play to his heart's content and not worry about the dogs slobbering all over him, and mom can do her cleaning while he plays. Number 4 is the little plastic rings that you can use to make your very own mobile of toys over the playpen, the swing, the car seat or whatever.
5. My Baby on the Go backpack. You can wear it upfront (when baby is smaller) and on the back and baby can face forward or toward you. I love it. It makes it so much easier to shop and get things done around the house! And I can walk the dogs and the baby at the same time. Two mastiffs and a stroller...we're not even close to that yet!
6. Jeep All-Terrain stroller. Great stroller! I like how easy it is to fold up and unfold. I also like the three tire set-up--it feels easier to handle to me. Next time, though, I think I will invest in a stroller that you can just put the car seat directly into the stroller. But other than that, I love my stroller and baby does too!
7. For baby acne and random baby rashes, I found California Baby Calendula Cream. It was kind of expensive, if I remember it was $12.00 for this small bottle, but you really don't use that much, a little goes a long way, and it really works. When Baby was about a month old, he started breaking out big time and his cute face was covered in acne and a red rash. I started putting this cream on his face, and his face was clear by the end of the week! It was the only thing I found that has worked! Now I don't put it on everyday, just when he needs it. It has a random smell (kind of like a spa-lotion) that I think smells fine but not necessarily like a baby. Hubs asked one night, "What is that funky smell?" =) Little did he know that that would be the least of his funky smell worries!
Now for some cute pictures! My mom seems to think that I pick on 'her' baby all day, so these are the kind of pictures I like to send her on a daily basis.
Cleaning baby--by the way, I have to admit something. I am a complete ditz! I took this picture and thought, "That brush looks just like a toilet brush! That's perfect, I'll tell my mom that I make the baby clean toilets!" But don't worry, germaphobes, I haven't been using this particular brush to clean toilets and then giving it to the baby! No, I thought it was a bottle brush and purchased it as such. I didn't realize what it was until I took this picture the other day. Now I need to go buy a bottle brush...
Chef-Boy-R-Double D slaving away to make us dinner. Baby loves to watch as he lies on the counter while I cook. And sometimes, I just can't resist the picture moment!
One thing that really worked with me getting Azzayah to sleep through the night was to wrap her up like a bunting (like they do in the hospital) I would wrap her up real tight and she would sleep so well. Although I tried with with Xavier and he was always too strong and would break right out of it. Azzayah I also put to bed later at night like 9 or so because Steve was on shift work. So when he was on days he didn't get home till 7 then when he was on nights I wanted her to sleep in so I could sleep in with him. I also did find that my kids slept better in their own bed. But that is very much personal preference. With Azzayah she was in our room for quite a while but in her own bed. With Xavier he was in our room in his own bed for about 6 months but he was such a light sleeper he ended up in his own room because he would wake up when either one of us would just roll over. For me it was better to have them in their own room. They took so much of my time during the day that was the one time Steve could have my undivided attention.
ReplyDeleteI would really think about investing in the stollers that you can put the car seats in. I LOVED mine. It was so nice when the kids were sleeping I could just pick them up out of the car, car seat and all, and take them into the mall or whatever. They can be a pain because they are so big but I really think its worth the investment. You should come out here to Sweet Pea boutique they have used ones a lot and most you can use whatever car seat in the stollers.
As far as the schedules go my kids both were on schedules for eating and sleeping but we didn't work around it for the most part. If we knew they needed to eat say in 30 min we would wait feed them then go. But for the most part we continued going as we always did. Especially with Azzayah we were always gone she always slept in her car seat and she was fine with it. With Xavier is got to be too much of a pain to pack everything and both kids into the car so we didn't go as much. Because of that he only likes HIS bed. He likes to be home at a certain time. He hates when we are out late and he has to come home and go straight to bed. So I say if he is fine with you being out and about go with it.
Also with feeding I tried to feed them right before I laid them down, that helped them sleep a little longer I think because their belly's were full. If he sucks down the bottle that you give him now before bed maybe try to give him another two ounces and that might help him sleep just that little bit longer too.
These are just things that I have found that worked for me and my kids. Both of my kids were so different and some things that one liked the other didn't. So its really just up to the baby and the mama what works best for you. When you find something that works I say use it. Whatever makes your life easier I am all for it.
My family thought I was a sleep tyrant, because I really cared about how much sleep J got(gets) at night and at nap time. But the Pediatrician did too and he even told me I was doing a good job, so I didn't pay much attention to my family when they made fun of me because we had to go home and put the baby to bed. I too read Babywise and Healthy Sleep Habits, I didn't follow them 100 % either but from babywise I figured out what J's normal habits were and then I was able to work with them, extend the sleep. I really like the Eat/Wake/Sleep patter too, and I used a 3- 4 hour window to help me figure out if he was tired or just cranky. I think what you were talking about with crying it out is fine, in fact I think that is called the Ferber Method- where you go in and give comfort at regular intervals. Eventually he will sleep through the night (then something will mess with his system and he will forget that he sleeps through the night and you will go through the whole process again, and again....)
ReplyDeleteI think sleeping in the car seat while you run your errands is a wonderful thing, I cried a little when J grew out of his car seat at 6 months because it meant I needed to be home or on my way home when he was going to get sleepy. But I am thinking of buying a double stroller that will work with my car seat with this new baby (and I am hoping that it is a girl, a little girl, who doesn't grow out of the infant seat until she is 1- wouldn't that be wonderful).
OH- and the sleeping with something over your eyes thing. I do that still, and I have started to notice J doing it- he is 2 so I don't worry about him pulling a blanket over his head. What about a hat, you could pull the hat over his eyes, if it is tight enough it shouldn't move and hopefully wouldn't cover his nose.
A couple of other tips. J was a mover and a shaker, the kid could move around his crib at 1 month old- don't ask me how. But by 4 months he was rolling over, which would wake him up in the middle of the night, and according to current info is a big no-no because he would end up on his stomach and wouldn't roll back over. We wrapped him tight- like at the hospital, but we used blankets that have velcro to keep them tight- amazing things, and then we used a sleep positioned to keep him on his back or we would put him on his side(he liked that)and he started sleeping through the night again. I called him my little baby burrito, the sweetest yummiest burrito ever.